Hi all!
Well, it's been a while since I posted...I started a post a few days ago, but time was not my friend and, alas, I could not post. Well, lots to catch up on!
Well, I'm fairly certain that I've started feeling the little one kick and move. I've kind of felt these flutters sporadically for the past 2 weeks, but was not completely sure. I'm almost certain now and even think I felt the LO roll over on Saturday. Kind of felt like a little rolling pin in my belly. I really only feel it when I am sitting quietly and my elastic waste of my pants is pushing in on my belly. Today, I've felt a little different one - kind of feels like gas, but is a very minor sharp feeling on my right side every once in a while. Kind of cool...I'll keep you posted if it turns out I'm right!
I am feeling much better this past couple of weeks. My last really bad day was the last day I posted, and that was a doozy of a day. Saturday after that, we went driving in the mountains, and the turns kind of made me nauseous too. BUT, the GREAT news, is nothing since then! We even went camping this weekend and I took the turns on the same drive up the mountains with NO problem! YAY!
I do notice that my sacrum hurts when I walk a lot. The sacrum is a bone that is just at the base of your spine and is between your two hip bones. I've known for some time that this particular joint on my body has more movement than in most people. I think this is from my many years as a gymnast. But, when you're PG and you have a lot of hormones that relax all of your joints, it makes this movement larger. Because of this, my body is relying on my muscles to keep it all in place, and they get overworked easily...thus the pain! But, I'm not going to let that stop me! I'm going to keep walking and hiking as much as I can so that I'm in decent shape when this little being is born in December!
Must to a shout out to Jen who recently got her BFP after a long hard road of trying. She stayed patient and showed much perseverance. I am just jumping up and down for her. Please keep her in your prayers that this little bean of hers is super sticky and snuggles down for the next 8 months or so! Also to Monty who is now done with her Molar/chemo chapter and is now writing her waiting chapter! But, come December, she'll start writing her TTC chapter again and we'll be with her to support her all of the way. One to Mary, who just had her amnio - I know everything will work out perfectly, but sending my love and prayers to her! AND, one to Olivia and her little Adelaide who was just born and is premature. I pray that her little one stays healthy and is able to go home really soon to be with her mommy and family. She is just beautiful!
Okay, that was a long post...but there was much to report on. I'll be gone to the in-laws in Davis, CA starting on Thursday and am not sure when/if I'll be able to post when I'm there. I would try to post on Tuesday, but I'm going to the outlet malls to try to find some more cheap maternity clothes for my trip to Davis (it will be HOT) so I look cute for the first time the in-laws see me and my PG belly.
Love to everyone and have a safe and happy July 4th holiday!
xoxo Yo!
Another ride on the roller coaster!
Sean Patrick - born 12/28/08
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
14w0d - insomnia and nausea...ugh
Hi all,
So, it's 3am and I'm having trouble sleeping. Partly because it's so hot, but mostly because of the pregnancy insomnia and waking with nausea. I wouldn't care so much but I have to work a 12-hour day tomorrow.... But, I know I can get through it and I know I'll be able to sleep this weekend to catch up.
I've always been such a good sleeper that this is something new for me to deal with, but I'm doing the best I can. My PA gave me a suggestion of having a hot towel or some hot liquid to get back to sleep, but it's just too dang hot here tonight, so I just can't do that. I'll probably try some relaxation techniques once the nausea and gas settle down.
That's it for now...more later. Love and hugs to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
So, it's 3am and I'm having trouble sleeping. Partly because it's so hot, but mostly because of the pregnancy insomnia and waking with nausea. I wouldn't care so much but I have to work a 12-hour day tomorrow.... But, I know I can get through it and I know I'll be able to sleep this weekend to catch up.
I've always been such a good sleeper that this is something new for me to deal with, but I'm doing the best I can. My PA gave me a suggestion of having a hot towel or some hot liquid to get back to sleep, but it's just too dang hot here tonight, so I just can't do that. I'll probably try some relaxation techniques once the nausea and gas settle down.
That's it for now...more later. Love and hugs to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
13w4d - Plans do change and WHERE is my energy?
Hi all!
Well, DH and I decided after getting our NT results (risk for Down's 1/1,781 and risk for trisomy 13 & 18 is 1/3021) that it really wasn't worth a risk of miscarriage as high as CVS, which is 1/200 - 1/250. We talked about it a lot and we feel good about our decision. We're still weighing the amnio option. CVS is a pretty invasive procedure and I would have been on bedrest for 24 hours and no heavy lifting for 4-5 days. AND, they said spotting is normal for 4-5 days. Boy, that would have really freaked me out. Decision made and done. YAY!
So, I felt very nauseous again this weekend, ugh. I really thought I was out of the woods when I had that WONDERFUL energy surge a week and a half ago. But, I have to remember it is NORMAL for it to faze out and to still have some bad days. My energy at my internship is still pretty good, but once I get home, I'm all tuckered out!
Internship is going great, and tomorrow will be a VERY busy day. I'll see many patients on my own and not have a ton of time for paperwork, so I might have to stay late. We'll see - I'll just do my best. I still really like my clinical instructor (CI). He now knows I'm PG, so it's pretty much out in the open now. Not everyone in the clinic knows, but I'm sure they'll know soon!
We told DH's parents this weekend and his older brother. They were super excited for us. They loved the u/s pics and videos. We'll be going up to Davis, CA to see them for the July Fourth weekend, and I know I'll be showing a lot more then. I'm already wearing some maternity pants, and some big, floofy tops. I think I might buy some more cute maternity stuff for the trip. Very exciting.
Other than that, just plodding along and I keep counting every day as a blessing. Sending special prayers to my bbc board for a nice BFP or 3.... Love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Well, DH and I decided after getting our NT results (risk for Down's 1/1,781 and risk for trisomy 13 & 18 is 1/3021) that it really wasn't worth a risk of miscarriage as high as CVS, which is 1/200 - 1/250. We talked about it a lot and we feel good about our decision. We're still weighing the amnio option. CVS is a pretty invasive procedure and I would have been on bedrest for 24 hours and no heavy lifting for 4-5 days. AND, they said spotting is normal for 4-5 days. Boy, that would have really freaked me out. Decision made and done. YAY!
So, I felt very nauseous again this weekend, ugh. I really thought I was out of the woods when I had that WONDERFUL energy surge a week and a half ago. But, I have to remember it is NORMAL for it to faze out and to still have some bad days. My energy at my internship is still pretty good, but once I get home, I'm all tuckered out!
Internship is going great, and tomorrow will be a VERY busy day. I'll see many patients on my own and not have a ton of time for paperwork, so I might have to stay late. We'll see - I'll just do my best. I still really like my clinical instructor (CI). He now knows I'm PG, so it's pretty much out in the open now. Not everyone in the clinic knows, but I'm sure they'll know soon!
We told DH's parents this weekend and his older brother. They were super excited for us. They loved the u/s pics and videos. We'll be going up to Davis, CA to see them for the July Fourth weekend, and I know I'll be showing a lot more then. I'm already wearing some maternity pants, and some big, floofy tops. I think I might buy some more cute maternity stuff for the trip. Very exciting.
Other than that, just plodding along and I keep counting every day as a blessing. Sending special prayers to my bbc board for a nice BFP or 3.... Love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Thursday, June 12, 2008
12w6d - Good OB Visit and CVS Settled
Hi all,
Boy, I was a little pissy on Tuesday. I guess I've calmed down about it since DH and I have a plan. There was no other dr who took our insurance who does CVS. (I'm not sure I really believe that, but I'm too exhausted to push the issue further.) We decided we're definitely going to do it and here is our plan:
1) DH to call on Mon am to dr that takes our insurance to try to get appt. This dr office told my OB office they would do everything possible to get us in, but that we had to call when the dr was back in the office on Mon.
2) If we can't get in, we're going to go ahead with the other dr and pay for the CVS. It will be expensive, but I'll be working again in October and we can start settling some bills then.
3) I am telling my clinical instructor on Mon about being PG. The has to happen because I'll need to be off the day of the CVS AND the next day on bed rest. The 4-5 days following the procedure, I cannot do ANY heavy lifting. They'll need to know my dr's restrictions and agree to let me work under modified conditions, or I'll just take the week off and make it up at the end of the internship.
I'm glad that's settled.
I has my 2nd OB appt today and it was amazing. My dr cancelled my visits twice, so I agreed to see the PA (physician's assistant). I've always had GREAT experiences with PAs and sometimes think they are better than the physicians themselves. She answered ALL of my questions thoughtfully and took the time to make me feel comfortable. The we turned on the Doppler to hear the heart beat. It took about 2 minutes, but then it was unmistakable. A strong, wonderful heartbeat. It was 168 beats a minute and lasted for about 10-15 seconds...then the little bean moved to start doing some other things. I was so happy and am smiling still. No, I don't have pictures to share, but feel lucky nonetheless. Thanks to God for blessing me with this little life.
Hope everyone else is doing great. Hugs and love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Boy, I was a little pissy on Tuesday. I guess I've calmed down about it since DH and I have a plan. There was no other dr who took our insurance who does CVS. (I'm not sure I really believe that, but I'm too exhausted to push the issue further.) We decided we're definitely going to do it and here is our plan:
1) DH to call on Mon am to dr that takes our insurance to try to get appt. This dr office told my OB office they would do everything possible to get us in, but that we had to call when the dr was back in the office on Mon.
2) If we can't get in, we're going to go ahead with the other dr and pay for the CVS. It will be expensive, but I'll be working again in October and we can start settling some bills then.
3) I am telling my clinical instructor on Mon about being PG. The has to happen because I'll need to be off the day of the CVS AND the next day on bed rest. The 4-5 days following the procedure, I cannot do ANY heavy lifting. They'll need to know my dr's restrictions and agree to let me work under modified conditions, or I'll just take the week off and make it up at the end of the internship.
I'm glad that's settled.
I has my 2nd OB appt today and it was amazing. My dr cancelled my visits twice, so I agreed to see the PA (physician's assistant). I've always had GREAT experiences with PAs and sometimes think they are better than the physicians themselves. She answered ALL of my questions thoughtfully and took the time to make me feel comfortable. The we turned on the Doppler to hear the heart beat. It took about 2 minutes, but then it was unmistakable. A strong, wonderful heartbeat. It was 168 beats a minute and lasted for about 10-15 seconds...then the little bean moved to start doing some other things. I was so happy and am smiling still. No, I don't have pictures to share, but feel lucky nonetheless. Thanks to God for blessing me with this little life.
Hope everyone else is doing great. Hugs and love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
12w4d - Dr. Scheduling is a NIGHTMARE!!!
Hi all.
I am at my wits end. I've been trying to get my 1st trimester screening scheduled for over 2 weeks now. My dr office is currently telling me that the ONLY dr I can see that is COVERED by insurance is Dr. X. Well, Dr. X will be out of town until June 16 and that is past the "window" of opportunity for which CVS can be performed, so his office told me they cannot do the test.
The other dr my dr office recommends is Dr. Y. Dr. Y's office doesn't take my insurance. We found this out on the DAY of my NT test! Because of this, we are out-of-pocket about $500 from the NT test. Up until that morning, we had been told it was ALL covered! We went ahead and scheduled the CVS with Dr. Y so we would at least have an appt somewhere.
BUT, now we're really trying to find a dr that can do the CVS where it is covered by insurance to save over $1,000. Since Dr. X will be out of town and Dr. Y isn't covered by insurance, WHERE DO I GO??? My dr office asked me at least 5 times if I had checked with Dr. X. I keep telling them, "DR X IS OUT OF TOWN. HE CANNOT DO MY CVS." I live in the HUGE metropolitan region of Los Angeles and you're telling me that I cannot have my CVS because the ONE dr that is covered by my medical group is out of town? And, basically, you're telling me I cannot have the CVS performed? WHAT??? Am I living in a small suburb of Romania? (Sarcasm is pretty ugly, huh?)
DH and I haven't truly decided if we're going to do the CVS and haven't received the results of the NT and blood test, but DH is really thinking he'd like us to have it. I'm not sure either, but I think it might put my mind to rest having it as well. I'd like to at least have the option....
Okay, needed to vent...waiting to hear back from my dr office to find out if there are any options for this conundrum. Told them I had to take care of this TODAY.
Plus, I'm still not sleeping past 3:30am on the past few nights...I wake up to pee and can't go back to sleep. I wish I could nap now, but making this appt is more important than sleep I guess.
xoxo Yo!
I am at my wits end. I've been trying to get my 1st trimester screening scheduled for over 2 weeks now. My dr office is currently telling me that the ONLY dr I can see that is COVERED by insurance is Dr. X. Well, Dr. X will be out of town until June 16 and that is past the "window" of opportunity for which CVS can be performed, so his office told me they cannot do the test.
The other dr my dr office recommends is Dr. Y. Dr. Y's office doesn't take my insurance. We found this out on the DAY of my NT test! Because of this, we are out-of-pocket about $500 from the NT test. Up until that morning, we had been told it was ALL covered! We went ahead and scheduled the CVS with Dr. Y so we would at least have an appt somewhere.
BUT, now we're really trying to find a dr that can do the CVS where it is covered by insurance to save over $1,000. Since Dr. X will be out of town and Dr. Y isn't covered by insurance, WHERE DO I GO??? My dr office asked me at least 5 times if I had checked with Dr. X. I keep telling them, "DR X IS OUT OF TOWN. HE CANNOT DO MY CVS." I live in the HUGE metropolitan region of Los Angeles and you're telling me that I cannot have my CVS because the ONE dr that is covered by my medical group is out of town? And, basically, you're telling me I cannot have the CVS performed? WHAT??? Am I living in a small suburb of Romania? (Sarcasm is pretty ugly, huh?)
DH and I haven't truly decided if we're going to do the CVS and haven't received the results of the NT and blood test, but DH is really thinking he'd like us to have it. I'm not sure either, but I think it might put my mind to rest having it as well. I'd like to at least have the option....
Okay, needed to vent...waiting to hear back from my dr office to find out if there are any options for this conundrum. Told them I had to take care of this TODAY.
Plus, I'm still not sleeping past 3:30am on the past few nights...I wake up to pee and can't go back to sleep. I wish I could nap now, but making this appt is more important than sleep I guess.
xoxo Yo!
Saturday, June 7, 2008
12w1d - So that's what energy feels like!
Hi all!
Wow, so I really just had my first day with GREAT energy! I got up at 7am after about 9 hours of sleep, and started cleaning. Yes, cleaning the apartment! I scrubbed the tub, then cleaned the patio/balcony - organized my plants (tomatoes and strawberry plants), swept the deck, did the dishes, dusted, and vacuumed. Oh, and showered all before 11am. Then I went out to the 3rd Street Promenade an walked up and down and did some shopping. I was pretty impressed. Before this, I could have done one or two of these things, but not ALL of these things! I am pretty tired now and am resting at home, but it was a really good day. I think I'm going to LOVE the 2nd trimester if this is indicative of what is to come!
Okay, so here's an attempt to post the video of the little bean from my ultrasound. The only video we got was done with external sound head, so the pictures aren't super clear, but you can see the little one in entirety and can see the heartbeat briefly. Her head is on the bottom right side of the video most of the time, and she face up. You can see her little body and legs on the left going upwards. (Oh, I'm going to alternate calling my little fetus between he and she...I'm still not convinced for sure that we are having a girl!) AND, yes, that big empty looking thing at the top is my super full bladder! Well, I think the video is about 3 minutes long, so enjoy! (If you push pause once it starts playing, you can let the video load and then it won't start and stop. Just a tip for viewing!)
Other than that, I'm enjoying my internship and hopefully getting better at what I do. I'm getting good feedback from my clinical instructor (CI), so I'm happy about that. The only hard part is the eating thing, but I'm figuring out quick meals I can have during the day. PB and Jelly has become a staple.
One fully thing...I've been craving chicken tacos and burritos and have had them several days in a row (from Taco Bell!). I finally weighed myself, thinking that, of course, that would have made me gain weight...but I actually lost. :-( But, I didn't lose too much and I am eating pretty much anything that I want. I try to make super healthy choices, so I'm not worrying about the number so much. So at this point, I've only gained 2.5 lbs in the first trimester. But from what I've read, I will start gaining about 1 pound a week starting in the 2nd trimester...that's kind of scary! All I can do is be as healthy for my little fetus as possible, which I am doing. I think I've been getting more exercise lately, so that could account for burning more calories.
That's it for now. Shout out to Holly - hope the birth of your little girl is/has gone great. Can't wait to see pics of her! CONGRATS to Monty for BF0 (at least as far as the lab is concerned)! Oh, and Jen...LOVELY chart and O! Hope this cycle is YOURS!
Love to you all!
xoxo Yo!
Wow, so I really just had my first day with GREAT energy! I got up at 7am after about 9 hours of sleep, and started cleaning. Yes, cleaning the apartment! I scrubbed the tub, then cleaned the patio/balcony - organized my plants (tomatoes and strawberry plants), swept the deck, did the dishes, dusted, and vacuumed. Oh, and showered all before 11am. Then I went out to the 3rd Street Promenade an walked up and down and did some shopping. I was pretty impressed. Before this, I could have done one or two of these things, but not ALL of these things! I am pretty tired now and am resting at home, but it was a really good day. I think I'm going to LOVE the 2nd trimester if this is indicative of what is to come!
Okay, so here's an attempt to post the video of the little bean from my ultrasound. The only video we got was done with external sound head, so the pictures aren't super clear, but you can see the little one in entirety and can see the heartbeat briefly. Her head is on the bottom right side of the video most of the time, and she face up. You can see her little body and legs on the left going upwards. (Oh, I'm going to alternate calling my little fetus between he and she...I'm still not convinced for sure that we are having a girl!) AND, yes, that big empty looking thing at the top is my super full bladder! Well, I think the video is about 3 minutes long, so enjoy! (If you push pause once it starts playing, you can let the video load and then it won't start and stop. Just a tip for viewing!)
Other than that, I'm enjoying my internship and hopefully getting better at what I do. I'm getting good feedback from my clinical instructor (CI), so I'm happy about that. The only hard part is the eating thing, but I'm figuring out quick meals I can have during the day. PB and Jelly has become a staple.
One fully thing...I've been craving chicken tacos and burritos and have had them several days in a row (from Taco Bell!). I finally weighed myself, thinking that, of course, that would have made me gain weight...but I actually lost. :-( But, I didn't lose too much and I am eating pretty much anything that I want. I try to make super healthy choices, so I'm not worrying about the number so much. So at this point, I've only gained 2.5 lbs in the first trimester. But from what I've read, I will start gaining about 1 pound a week starting in the 2nd trimester...that's kind of scary! All I can do is be as healthy for my little fetus as possible, which I am doing. I think I've been getting more exercise lately, so that could account for burning more calories.
That's it for now. Shout out to Holly - hope the birth of your little girl is/has gone great. Can't wait to see pics of her! CONGRATS to Monty for BF0 (at least as far as the lab is concerned)! Oh, and Jen...LOVELY chart and O! Hope this cycle is YOURS!
Love to you all!
xoxo Yo!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
11w6d - Ultrasound Today
Hi all!
Today we had our 2nd ultrasound where they measured the nuchal translucency and took a blood test to see our risk of chromosomal trisomy. The dr said nuchal fold measured at 1.1 which he said was good. We won't know what our risk is until after the blood work is analyzed which will take about 7-10 days. We are going to schedule a CVS and we will probably go ahead and have it done as well. The technician first tried to do an external u/s, and boy my bladder was full. She even made a comment about it. But, because I have a retroverted uterus (tilted), they couldn't get near enough to see the neck for the test. I don't have any pics from this, but I'll post the video when I figure out how to convert it to the proper format. I must say, it was so nice to see the little heartbeat going pitter-patter!
So, now the fun part. The close pictures! These are from the internal u/s! I can't believe this is my body...kind of doesn't feel like I'm pregnant right now! The first pic has the head on the left and the abdomin on the R. You can see the little eye sockets, the nose bone:
Wow - so cute!
Yikes, pg brain is starting to take over...I can't even remember what I wrote in the first paragraph without looking back at it! Too funny!
So the dr thinks we're having a girl...he said it like he was pretty sure, but I know that these kind of early guesses can be wrong. But, might be true - he is a specialist and is trained in taking very specific ultrasounds. Wow...no matter what, I thank God for blessing us thus far.
That's it for now. I must get some sleep for my long day tomorrow. Well, tomorrow is actually a shorter day for me since I worked longer on Tuesday. Then the weekend - LOVE the weekends!
Sending love and hugs to all!
xoxo Yo!
Today we had our 2nd ultrasound where they measured the nuchal translucency and took a blood test to see our risk of chromosomal trisomy. The dr said nuchal fold measured at 1.1 which he said was good. We won't know what our risk is until after the blood work is analyzed which will take about 7-10 days. We are going to schedule a CVS and we will probably go ahead and have it done as well. The technician first tried to do an external u/s, and boy my bladder was full. She even made a comment about it. But, because I have a retroverted uterus (tilted), they couldn't get near enough to see the neck for the test. I don't have any pics from this, but I'll post the video when I figure out how to convert it to the proper format. I must say, it was so nice to see the little heartbeat going pitter-patter!
So, now the fun part. The close pictures! These are from the internal u/s! I can't believe this is my body...kind of doesn't feel like I'm pregnant right now! The first pic has the head on the left and the abdomin on the R. You can see the little eye sockets, the nose bone:
The second one is with the head on the left again, but the mouth is open:
Wow - so cute!Yikes, pg brain is starting to take over...I can't even remember what I wrote in the first paragraph without looking back at it! Too funny!
So the dr thinks we're having a girl...he said it like he was pretty sure, but I know that these kind of early guesses can be wrong. But, might be true - he is a specialist and is trained in taking very specific ultrasounds. Wow...no matter what, I thank God for blessing us thus far.
That's it for now. I must get some sleep for my long day tomorrow. Well, tomorrow is actually a shorter day for me since I worked longer on Tuesday. Then the weekend - LOVE the weekends!
Sending love and hugs to all!
xoxo Yo!
Sunday, June 1, 2008
11w2d - 1st week of internship done!
Hi all!
Well, I've completed my first week of my internship and although I get very nervous before I go in, by the end of the day I'm just so happy. I really love my job and hope that I continue to improve my skills as I get more experience. I ended up seeing 3 patients almost entirely on my own, so I was happy about that. Before I left for work on Friday though, I had the most severe bout of nausea I've had so far. I think it was a combo of nausea and nerves that made it as bad as it was. I didn't throw up, but did sit by the toilet for a while and carried a plastic bag in my pocket for just in case. It got better towards the end of the day. Generally, I think I'm feeling better, so maybe it's on it's way out! FX for that!
Okay, so you really can't see anything (but me looking like I've had too many cookies), but here is my first belly slide show. I always ask people to post, so I figured I'd share early on. I'll keep updating and posting as I grow. I've gained 3.5 lbs so far. It should show me at 4, 8, 9, 10, and 11 weeks, so be patient while it loads! Don't laught at me too much!
Well, I've completed my first week of my internship and although I get very nervous before I go in, by the end of the day I'm just so happy. I really love my job and hope that I continue to improve my skills as I get more experience. I ended up seeing 3 patients almost entirely on my own, so I was happy about that. Before I left for work on Friday though, I had the most severe bout of nausea I've had so far. I think it was a combo of nausea and nerves that made it as bad as it was. I didn't throw up, but did sit by the toilet for a while and carried a plastic bag in my pocket for just in case. It got better towards the end of the day. Generally, I think I'm feeling better, so maybe it's on it's way out! FX for that!
Okay, so you really can't see anything (but me looking like I've had too many cookies), but here is my first belly slide show. I always ask people to post, so I figured I'd share early on. I'll keep updating and posting as I grow. I've gained 3.5 lbs so far. It should show me at 4, 8, 9, 10, and 11 weeks, so be patient while it loads! Don't laught at me too much!
Other than that, we get our nuchal translucency test on Thursday, so we get to get a view of the little bean. I know I'll get super nervous that day, but will post once we're home. For those of you waiting, the appt is 9am Pacific time and the appt is 2 1/2 hours long. They do genetic counseling first, then the blood test, then the u/s. I'm hoping the dr tells us right away how the u/s looks, but results aren't promised until 7-10 business days after the appt. We'll decide if we're going to go ahead with the CVS after we find out the results of this test.
That's it for now. Sending everyone tons of love!
xoxo Yo!
Monday, May 26, 2008
10w3d - What a Journey
Hi all!
Well, still pg and very happy about it! But, I have been more emotional and m/s lately. I still haven't vomited, but it's been close. The past few weeks I seem to have 2-3 days of heavy nausea, then it's better...just hoping I make it through my long internship days without puking! This is my schedule:
Mon - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
Tues - 7a-11a - 4 hours
Wed - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
Thurs - off
Fri - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
On one hand, it's nice I have 2 days during the week where I can schedule appts, but I think Mon-Wed might be tough. I know I can do it though and I'm so excited to get the opportunity to start working as a Physical Therapist. I can't believe I've graduated! Oh, which brings me to the next topic, graduation!
Love this picture - it's of my closest friends during our 3-year masters program. We studied so much together and I feel lucky to have found them as friends. Graduation was wonderful, but the day went so quickly. Plus, I had only had about 5 hours of sleep the night before and had to be up at 5am so we could get to graduation by 7am. Our professors sat with us during the ceremony and it was wonderful. Then we had our department celebration - here's a group picture with most of us:
Then we had a small family celebration with my 4 girls. We all made a dish and planned it together. It was such a great time to get to meet our families.
Well, still pg and very happy about it! But, I have been more emotional and m/s lately. I still haven't vomited, but it's been close. The past few weeks I seem to have 2-3 days of heavy nausea, then it's better...just hoping I make it through my long internship days without puking! This is my schedule:
Mon - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
Tues - 7a-11a - 4 hours
Wed - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
Thurs - off
Fri - 7a-7p - 12 hours!
On one hand, it's nice I have 2 days during the week where I can schedule appts, but I think Mon-Wed might be tough. I know I can do it though and I'm so excited to get the opportunity to start working as a Physical Therapist. I can't believe I've graduated! Oh, which brings me to the next topic, graduation!
Love this picture - it's of my closest friends during our 3-year masters program. We studied so much together and I feel lucky to have found them as friends. Graduation was wonderful, but the day went so quickly. Plus, I had only had about 5 hours of sleep the night before and had to be up at 5am so we could get to graduation by 7am. Our professors sat with us during the ceremony and it was wonderful. Then we had our department celebration - here's a group picture with most of us:
Then we had a small family celebration with my 4 girls. We all made a dish and planned it together. It was such a great time to get to meet our families. 
We had this cake made that said, "Congratulations R.A.L.Y, MPTs" - the RALY is the 1st initial of each of our first names and the degree is Master of Physical Therapy. We talked about maybe opening up a private practice together one day after we've all had some time to get experience. So exciting.
Well, changing the subject, one thing that has been on my mind lately and I even had a vivid dream about it last night, was how much I miss my Mom. She passed away in 1993. I'm not someone who clings to "dates" (I don't need to think about her on Mother's Day or her birthday or the day she died) but I let myself feel her when it comes to me. I don't remember much of my dream, but I know it was about missing her. I think that's one of the reason I need my friends so much now that I'm pg - so I can ask questions I would have asked her. I do think she is with God and I hope she is ecstatic that I'm pregnant. She was a beautiful woman and loving mother. I miss her so much. I'm not one to linger on sadness though, but rather I try to celebrate the life she had and the legacy she left behind.
DH is amazing as always and has really helped me when I've been emotional or felt nauseous. We got lots of stuff done this weekend and had some fun too. Oh, and we've decided that we'll get the CVS testing done (chorionic villus sampling). We'll get the u/s that measures the nuchal fold with the blood test to see what our risk is first. If the risk is super low, we'll probably opt out of the CVS or amnio. We'll see what happens though. Because I'll be 40 when the baby is born, I'm at a higher risk to find chromosomal problems.
Okay, that's it for now. Sending my love to everyone for a happy and healthy Memorial Day weekend.
xoxo Yo!
Monday, May 19, 2008
9w3d - Always Catching Up!
Hi Everyone!
Well, I had no idea how much being pregnant would take out of me! I love it! But, that means that my posts are a little fewer and farther in between. Plus, I've been dealing with final exams and tying up loose ends for graduation, so that's taken what energy I have left. Oh yeah, and DH, that I love so much, need some QT with him too! (I would take QT with DH ANYTIME I could get it!)
Well, as far as being pregnant - still pregnant. I know that might be getting old for some of you, but I take each and every day as a blessing and a miracle. I take as good care of myself as I possibly can. I still feel pg. I have morning sickness at night (not as much in the morning). Eating is still a chore, but one I consider important to keep the morning sickness at bay. I've gotten into a little routine of eating: breakfast is a bowl of cereal as soon as I get up, then early lunch around 11, then snack at 2-3p, then dinner around 5:30p. I am so picky with what I eat now and if I get off schedule, I feel it. I cannot eat a big meal without feeling so bloated I feel like I'll pop! I also need a lot of sleep and rest. My energy is low, but I try to counter it by getting enough sleep at night and walking as much as possible to stay in shape. The pg symptoms ebb and flow, some days they are almost non-existent and some days I am miserable in that "I'm so happy I'm pregnant" way. DH and I celebrate a bit when I do feel symptoms because it's an outward sign that something is happening. I thank God every day and pray for Him to bless this little life inside of me. I know He listens.
I've gained about 1.5 lbs and my bra doesn't fit. I feel "fat" and had to buy a bunch of new shirts so I can hide my gassy protruding belly. I am not going to tell my internship clinical instructor about my pregnancy until July sometime, if then. Once I feel like they trust me as a physical therapist and know my work ethic I might tell them. I don't want them to question my values at all. So I buy non-maternity shirts in a larger size to "hide" the changes to my body. I know they can't discriminate against me, but I'd rather they see my work stand for itself before I tell them. My hours will be tough - M, W, F 7a-7p and T 7a-11a. That will give me half of Tuesday and all of Thursday to rest and recuperate and get my errands done. Oh, yeah, and to study for my board exams I hope to take in October! At least with this test, I can take it as many times as I need.
My graduation is on Thursday and I will graduate "with distinction" which means I finished with an overall GPA of over 3.885. (Actually, my graduate GPA will be around 3.9, so I'm very pleased.) I'll post pictures of the festivities. My Dad is coming into town for a short 48 hours to see me walk and I'm so happy. It means so much to me.
It's funny, DH and I joke about the size of my little one occasionally...it started as a poppy seed, then a sesame seed, then a lentil bean, then a kidney bean...I tell him I'm cooking a stew! ;-) Now we're moving into the fruit - I guess I'm growing a precious little grape this week and next week, Mary tells me I'll be working on a kumquat! Keep on growing little one - you have a lot of people praying for you to grow strong.
This is an amazing journey. One I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. Thanks for reading the blog. Love to everyone.
xoxo Yo!
Well, I had no idea how much being pregnant would take out of me! I love it! But, that means that my posts are a little fewer and farther in between. Plus, I've been dealing with final exams and tying up loose ends for graduation, so that's taken what energy I have left. Oh yeah, and DH, that I love so much, need some QT with him too! (I would take QT with DH ANYTIME I could get it!)
Well, as far as being pregnant - still pregnant. I know that might be getting old for some of you, but I take each and every day as a blessing and a miracle. I take as good care of myself as I possibly can. I still feel pg. I have morning sickness at night (not as much in the morning). Eating is still a chore, but one I consider important to keep the morning sickness at bay. I've gotten into a little routine of eating: breakfast is a bowl of cereal as soon as I get up, then early lunch around 11, then snack at 2-3p, then dinner around 5:30p. I am so picky with what I eat now and if I get off schedule, I feel it. I cannot eat a big meal without feeling so bloated I feel like I'll pop! I also need a lot of sleep and rest. My energy is low, but I try to counter it by getting enough sleep at night and walking as much as possible to stay in shape. The pg symptoms ebb and flow, some days they are almost non-existent and some days I am miserable in that "I'm so happy I'm pregnant" way. DH and I celebrate a bit when I do feel symptoms because it's an outward sign that something is happening. I thank God every day and pray for Him to bless this little life inside of me. I know He listens.
I've gained about 1.5 lbs and my bra doesn't fit. I feel "fat" and had to buy a bunch of new shirts so I can hide my gassy protruding belly. I am not going to tell my internship clinical instructor about my pregnancy until July sometime, if then. Once I feel like they trust me as a physical therapist and know my work ethic I might tell them. I don't want them to question my values at all. So I buy non-maternity shirts in a larger size to "hide" the changes to my body. I know they can't discriminate against me, but I'd rather they see my work stand for itself before I tell them. My hours will be tough - M, W, F 7a-7p and T 7a-11a. That will give me half of Tuesday and all of Thursday to rest and recuperate and get my errands done. Oh, yeah, and to study for my board exams I hope to take in October! At least with this test, I can take it as many times as I need.
My graduation is on Thursday and I will graduate "with distinction" which means I finished with an overall GPA of over 3.885. (Actually, my graduate GPA will be around 3.9, so I'm very pleased.) I'll post pictures of the festivities. My Dad is coming into town for a short 48 hours to see me walk and I'm so happy. It means so much to me.
It's funny, DH and I joke about the size of my little one occasionally...it started as a poppy seed, then a sesame seed, then a lentil bean, then a kidney bean...I tell him I'm cooking a stew! ;-) Now we're moving into the fruit - I guess I'm growing a precious little grape this week and next week, Mary tells me I'll be working on a kumquat! Keep on growing little one - you have a lot of people praying for you to grow strong.
This is an amazing journey. One I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. Thanks for reading the blog. Love to everyone.
xoxo Yo!
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Comp Exams
I PASSED!!!
I can't believe it, but I'm almost due to graduate. It's been a LONG journey (started in June 2001), but my dream is almost complete. I know I'm going to LOVE my job and I look forward to the many adventures ahead.
Love to everyone - thanks for all of your prayers!
xoxo Yo!
I can't believe it, but I'm almost due to graduate. It's been a LONG journey (started in June 2001), but my dream is almost complete. I know I'm going to LOVE my job and I look forward to the many adventures ahead.
Love to everyone - thanks for all of your prayers!
xoxo Yo!
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Most Beautiful Heartbeat Ever
Hi all,
Well, relief - the dr visit went great and we saw a wonderful heartbeat. The dr said everything is right on track and official due date is 12/19. (I measured slightly bigger than that, but she's going to keep the date FF predicts based on my O date.) I just started crying and am still crying. Here's the pic:
Well, relief - the dr visit went great and we saw a wonderful heartbeat. The dr said everything is right on track and official due date is 12/19. (I measured slightly bigger than that, but she's going to keep the date FF predicts based on my O date.) I just started crying and am still crying. Here's the pic:
I feel so blessed right now. Thanks to all my girls praying for me. God listened and we have crossed a major hurdle. I just can't believe I have a little life with heartbeat growing strong inside of me. It's truly a miracle. Love to you all!
xoxo Yo!
7w5d - DR APPT TODAY!
Hi all!
Well, my first dr appt is today and I'm quite nervous. I will get an u/s and will post it if everything is okay. I am def feeling more pg, just hope that means good news. Thanks to everyone for all of their thoughts and prayers. Appt is at 1pm, so it will be a few hours after when I post the results. Tons of love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Well, my first dr appt is today and I'm quite nervous. I will get an u/s and will post it if everything is okay. I am def feeling more pg, just hope that means good news. Thanks to everyone for all of their thoughts and prayers. Appt is at 1pm, so it will be a few hours after when I post the results. Tons of love to everyone!
xoxo Yo!
Sunday, May 4, 2008
7w2d - Catching Up...
Hi everyone!
Sorry I haven't posted, but I've been so consumed with my comprehensive exams that I haven't really had time for much else. Don't ask me how I did on them...I am very hard on myself and NEVER think I do well on a test. I am praying I passed...they were REALLY hard. The good thing is...if I get all A's and 1 A- this semester, I'll graduate with honors. Interesting that I'm not sure how I did yet it is a strong possibility that I'll graduate with honors...ironic.
Okay, so here's the "drama" that happened last week. Okay, read this article...actually, you only need to read page 2 the first and second paragraph:
http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2008/04/23/chalked_up/index.html
Well, I am the "Yolande" she is referring to. I thought this person was my friend...although we don't talk that often, but I never knew she was going to trash me in her little "expose" novel. Okay, just so you can decide for yourself, here are two videos from 1986, the year she is talking about. One is of me and the other is of her. You decide if I have 10-15 lbs to lose:
Here is me winning the national floor championship in 1986:
Here is the video of Jennifer that she posts on her youtube site:
I'm told my DH and myself that I would wait until after comps to figure out if I wanted to respond to this insult. (DH has been so protective of me in all of this.) But, I don't think I'll do anything at this point. 1) I knew she was writing the book, 2) she never asked my permission to use my name in the book or refer to me, and 3) I feel sorry for her that, 25 years later she still has to put down other people to get resolution with her childhood. Her comments are unnecessary, and show exactly the kind of person she is, so I am not giving it a lot of credence.
I signed on to a popular gymnastics message board that I lurk, and all of the people there were basically trashing her and supporting me. I never post (and didn't for this), but people were very complimentary of me and my gymnastics, so I feel good. I think I'll just ignore it for now.
Okay, on to the pregnancy...I somehow made it through all my comp studying not feeling too bad. I was spending over 12 hours per day in the library for the last two weeks. I think I just told my brain to ignore everything. I tried my best to not get too stressed, but to study as much as possible. I went to bed around 9:30pm every night. I made it - can't even believe it. Weird, now that I don't have that same kind of focus, I definitely feel pregnant...and it is kicking my behind. I have trouble eating but force myself and am exhausted both after the exam on Friday as well as Sat and Sun. I did breakdown and POAS yesterday...my last FRER...yes, still VERY pg. I think I'm done POAS and temping now.
Exciting and scary part is now the first dr appt and u/s on Wednesday at 1pm. I'll post and let everyone know, but it is tough. DH and I have discussed it, and he keeps reassuring me that no matter what, we are super strong together and can get through anything. Hearing his reassurance helps me so much - I am grateful for his support.
Okay, well I think that's enough for today! I'll catch up more as I feel able to and not too fatigued. Thanks to everyone for the support and prayers. I don't think I could have made it this far without you all. All I can do is take one day at a time. Love to you all!
xoxo Yo!
Sorry I haven't posted, but I've been so consumed with my comprehensive exams that I haven't really had time for much else. Don't ask me how I did on them...I am very hard on myself and NEVER think I do well on a test. I am praying I passed...they were REALLY hard. The good thing is...if I get all A's and 1 A- this semester, I'll graduate with honors. Interesting that I'm not sure how I did yet it is a strong possibility that I'll graduate with honors...ironic.
Okay, so here's the "drama" that happened last week. Okay, read this article...actually, you only need to read page 2 the first and second paragraph:
http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2008/04/23/chalked_up/index.html
Well, I am the "Yolande" she is referring to. I thought this person was my friend...although we don't talk that often, but I never knew she was going to trash me in her little "expose" novel. Okay, just so you can decide for yourself, here are two videos from 1986, the year she is talking about. One is of me and the other is of her. You decide if I have 10-15 lbs to lose:
Here is me winning the national floor championship in 1986:
Here is the video of Jennifer that she posts on her youtube site:
I'm told my DH and myself that I would wait until after comps to figure out if I wanted to respond to this insult. (DH has been so protective of me in all of this.) But, I don't think I'll do anything at this point. 1) I knew she was writing the book, 2) she never asked my permission to use my name in the book or refer to me, and 3) I feel sorry for her that, 25 years later she still has to put down other people to get resolution with her childhood. Her comments are unnecessary, and show exactly the kind of person she is, so I am not giving it a lot of credence.
I signed on to a popular gymnastics message board that I lurk, and all of the people there were basically trashing her and supporting me. I never post (and didn't for this), but people were very complimentary of me and my gymnastics, so I feel good. I think I'll just ignore it for now.
Okay, on to the pregnancy...I somehow made it through all my comp studying not feeling too bad. I was spending over 12 hours per day in the library for the last two weeks. I think I just told my brain to ignore everything. I tried my best to not get too stressed, but to study as much as possible. I went to bed around 9:30pm every night. I made it - can't even believe it. Weird, now that I don't have that same kind of focus, I definitely feel pregnant...and it is kicking my behind. I have trouble eating but force myself and am exhausted both after the exam on Friday as well as Sat and Sun. I did breakdown and POAS yesterday...my last FRER...yes, still VERY pg. I think I'm done POAS and temping now.
Exciting and scary part is now the first dr appt and u/s on Wednesday at 1pm. I'll post and let everyone know, but it is tough. DH and I have discussed it, and he keeps reassuring me that no matter what, we are super strong together and can get through anything. Hearing his reassurance helps me so much - I am grateful for his support.
Okay, well I think that's enough for today! I'll catch up more as I feel able to and not too fatigued. Thanks to everyone for the support and prayers. I don't think I could have made it this far without you all. All I can do is take one day at a time. Love to you all!
xoxo Yo!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Finally...Comp Exams tomorrow & 6w5d
Hi Everyone!
Well, I haven't had time to post recently because all I have been doing is studying for my comp exams. I can't believe they start tomorrow. Funny story, yesterday, we (me and my 4 best friends in my program) went to see a professor during office hours to go over a particularly hard gait/prosthetics/orthotics exam. In the hall, we saw many of our other professors. ALL of them looked at us and said, "of all the people taking the comps, you all have the least to worry about." It was unanimous too...each professor said basically the same thing, that we would do fine knowing that all of us are very good students. It was nice to hear. Nonetheless, I'm still a bit stressed. I have been trying as much as possible to not stress because I know it is not good for me when I'm pregnant. I've done pretty well for the most part.
The only time I had a MAJOR breakdown was on Monday. It was super hot here on Sun and Mon. Our apartment gets super hot. We do have a room air conditioner in the bedroom, but it makes a lot of noise and it startled me when DH turned it off on Sun night. So, I ended up being up from 1-4am. I had to be up at 8am the next day for class, then was going to study after for the rest of the day. Our class went late, I was having some horrible abdominal gas pain and bloating and I could feel the tears coming. I tried to make it to my car so my friends wouldn't see me have a breakdown, but one of them followed me so I could give her a ride. Right next to my car I completely lost it. She was really nice and just said to let it out. I cried all the way to our next study location and pretty much got it out. It was the combo of 1) being super tired, 2) being an emotional pregnant woman, 3) not feeling very good, and 4) being stressed that I needed to study and how was I going to do it under these conditions. Well, that's the only time it happened, so that's good. I've tried to be as productive as possible without taking myself too seriously. The consequences are to great if I allow for that. I don't want to harm the precious baby growing within me. That is worth everything in the world.
Well, next Wednesday is my first OB appt and u/s. I'm excited and really scared at the same time. I've tried to envision it going really well, but there's this fear inside that it won't be. I keep trying to remind myself that it is in God's hands, and that he has a plan for me. That's all I can do right now. DH will be going with me, so I'm praying it will be exactly what we want to see. An amazing beating heart on a tiny little being.
That's all for now...I'll check in again this weekend after my comp exams. Wish me luck!
xoxo Yo!
Well, I haven't had time to post recently because all I have been doing is studying for my comp exams. I can't believe they start tomorrow. Funny story, yesterday, we (me and my 4 best friends in my program) went to see a professor during office hours to go over a particularly hard gait/prosthetics/orthotics exam. In the hall, we saw many of our other professors. ALL of them looked at us and said, "of all the people taking the comps, you all have the least to worry about." It was unanimous too...each professor said basically the same thing, that we would do fine knowing that all of us are very good students. It was nice to hear. Nonetheless, I'm still a bit stressed. I have been trying as much as possible to not stress because I know it is not good for me when I'm pregnant. I've done pretty well for the most part.
The only time I had a MAJOR breakdown was on Monday. It was super hot here on Sun and Mon. Our apartment gets super hot. We do have a room air conditioner in the bedroom, but it makes a lot of noise and it startled me when DH turned it off on Sun night. So, I ended up being up from 1-4am. I had to be up at 8am the next day for class, then was going to study after for the rest of the day. Our class went late, I was having some horrible abdominal gas pain and bloating and I could feel the tears coming. I tried to make it to my car so my friends wouldn't see me have a breakdown, but one of them followed me so I could give her a ride. Right next to my car I completely lost it. She was really nice and just said to let it out. I cried all the way to our next study location and pretty much got it out. It was the combo of 1) being super tired, 2) being an emotional pregnant woman, 3) not feeling very good, and 4) being stressed that I needed to study and how was I going to do it under these conditions. Well, that's the only time it happened, so that's good. I've tried to be as productive as possible without taking myself too seriously. The consequences are to great if I allow for that. I don't want to harm the precious baby growing within me. That is worth everything in the world.
Well, next Wednesday is my first OB appt and u/s. I'm excited and really scared at the same time. I've tried to envision it going really well, but there's this fear inside that it won't be. I keep trying to remind myself that it is in God's hands, and that he has a plan for me. That's all I can do right now. DH will be going with me, so I'm praying it will be exactly what we want to see. An amazing beating heart on a tiny little being.
That's all for now...I'll check in again this weekend after my comp exams. Wish me luck!
xoxo Yo!
Saturday, April 26, 2008
6w1d
Hi all!
Sorry I haven't posted in while, but my comprehensive exams have been consuming much of my time of late. I'm pretty nervous for them. They are 2 four-hour days of testing that will take place on May 1 & 2 (next week). I must achieve a score of 75%. If I do not, I get one more time to take the test. If I do not pass the test at that point, I will not get my degree of master of physical therapy and 3 years of tough schooling go to waste. Now, I will say that no one has ever failed twice, so everyone has received their degree, and in the past few years, no one has failed taking the first test. So, I should take comfort in that and know that I get A's in most of my classes, so I should pass. But, being newly pregnant, my hormones are assisting me to be a bit scared about it.
Okay, about my pregnancy. I'm still pregnant. I am so thankful for that. I am moody, my boobs are very sore, I have occasional nausea, I fatigue easily, I have been constipated (but today had diarrhea). Oh, and I took another pregnancy test (my last Internet one) and it was as dark as the test can go. I haven't temp'd in a while, because my nose is stuffy and I sleep with my mouth open. I know if I would temp after open-mouth breathing and it was lower, it would freak me out, so I just skip it. For now, that has to be enough. DH is amazing - loving and caring as always. I am so lucky to have found such a wonderful partner in life.
My first OB appt is on May 7. It's a week and a half away, and I hope this little one is still with us and has a strong beating heart. That will be a miracle from God to see. I know it's in His hands, but I do my best to take care of myself - eating right and getting enough sleep - so I'm doing as much as I can.
Prayers out to Dawn for her loss. I hope everything passes soon so she and DH can start trying again. To go through three losses is so difficult, but she is an amazingly strong woman. Prayers also to Monty that her numbers continue the downward trend they are currently on. She deserves to move on from chemo and begin her 365 countdown.
For anyone that was interested, Mary's u/s went great. With any luck, we'll get to be pregnant together with only 2 weeks separating our delivery date. That would be amazing and lucky.
Love to all - thanks for reading and for all the prayers for a sticky bean this time. I so appreciate it.
xoxo Yo!
Sorry I haven't posted in while, but my comprehensive exams have been consuming much of my time of late. I'm pretty nervous for them. They are 2 four-hour days of testing that will take place on May 1 & 2 (next week). I must achieve a score of 75%. If I do not, I get one more time to take the test. If I do not pass the test at that point, I will not get my degree of master of physical therapy and 3 years of tough schooling go to waste. Now, I will say that no one has ever failed twice, so everyone has received their degree, and in the past few years, no one has failed taking the first test. So, I should take comfort in that and know that I get A's in most of my classes, so I should pass. But, being newly pregnant, my hormones are assisting me to be a bit scared about it.
Okay, about my pregnancy. I'm still pregnant. I am so thankful for that. I am moody, my boobs are very sore, I have occasional nausea, I fatigue easily, I have been constipated (but today had diarrhea). Oh, and I took another pregnancy test (my last Internet one) and it was as dark as the test can go. I haven't temp'd in a while, because my nose is stuffy and I sleep with my mouth open. I know if I would temp after open-mouth breathing and it was lower, it would freak me out, so I just skip it. For now, that has to be enough. DH is amazing - loving and caring as always. I am so lucky to have found such a wonderful partner in life.
My first OB appt is on May 7. It's a week and a half away, and I hope this little one is still with us and has a strong beating heart. That will be a miracle from God to see. I know it's in His hands, but I do my best to take care of myself - eating right and getting enough sleep - so I'm doing as much as I can.
Prayers out to Dawn for her loss. I hope everything passes soon so she and DH can start trying again. To go through three losses is so difficult, but she is an amazingly strong woman. Prayers also to Monty that her numbers continue the downward trend they are currently on. She deserves to move on from chemo and begin her 365 countdown.
For anyone that was interested, Mary's u/s went great. With any luck, we'll get to be pregnant together with only 2 weeks separating our delivery date. That would be amazing and lucky.
Love to all - thanks for reading and for all the prayers for a sticky bean this time. I so appreciate it.
xoxo Yo!
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Still Nervous...in a holding pattern
Well, first of all, I was a little nervous today because I didn't have to get up last night because of gassiness or to urinate, and today I didn't really feel that pregnant - not like I have been the other days. I do have very store bbs and am still constipated (sorry if TMI). I'm hoping I wasn't nauseous because I've been very good at eating frequently. I did temp and test this am, and HUGE BFP, so I guess that means I'm still pg. I really don't think I'll ever feel like I'm out of the woods on this. Maybe I'll feel better if I have a good u/s. Here's my BFP progression...
12 DPO
18 DPO
12 DPO
18 DPO 23 DPO - today - 4/20/08
Speaking of u/s, that's the other thing. My dr office messed up on my appt and my dr isn't available for an initial pregnancy visit until June. So, I have to see another dr and that will happen on 5/7. Interestingly enough, if I make it that far, I'll be 7w5d. Love how numbers do that sometimes. So, I pray all the time for God to look after this little life growing inside me. I know he has a plan for me and I just hope that his plans include me giving birth in December.
Sorry if I bug anyone with my "I'm so scared" posts, but it is really hard after having multiple m/c. I probably analyze things WAY too much. But, it's all I have right now, so that's what I'm going on for now. Thanks to everyone for their prayers for my little bean!
I will say, DH is amazing every day and in every way. He is so good to me and makes me smile all the time. I feel blessed to have him in my life and know that no matter what happens, we can get through this uncertainty together.
Love to everyone.
xoxo Yo!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Old Habits Die Hard
Hi Everyone!
Well, I did temp this morning and it's still up, so that's good. But, I didn't really "feel" pg today at all except for a short time during lunch when I waited to long to eat. I've noticed my hands get shaky if I don't have a snack between breakfast and lunch. Then I worked in our PT Student clinic. I was still feeling pretty "normal," so I decided when I got home I would POAS to make sure. Well, it was kind of interesting! A line came up instantly and in my mind, I just figured it was the control line. Then I looked at it further and realized it was the test line! After the 10 minutes passed, the line was DEFINITELY much, much darker than the original line. Here it is:
The other thing I did notice today, is that my weepiness came back. I was watching Desperate Housewives and almost started crying during it. I also started crying on my walk with Mary tonight. And, I got tears in my eyes when I read Holly's post about how great the ladies we have on our board are. It really is an amazing group that is so supportive of one another and she summed it up eloquantly. Thank Holly - right back at you. I completely agree.
As I mentioned above, I had a nice long walk with Mary tonight, which is always good for my soul. She has her u/s tomorrow and I'm wishing her the best of luck with it. I hope she and her DH get to see a nice beating heart! She is really helping me stay positive right now. I can't thank her enough - and she being newly pregnant too - I feel so lucky.
Okay, to my BBC girls: Prayers out to Dawn - hope she find some good news out about her beta numbers - that she's PG with a sticky little bean!!! Prayers to Jen and the other girls on the BBC board - I so hope they all get their BFPs soon! Boy, if that happens, I'm going to start calling this the Miracle board. And, lastly, prayers out to Monty, who needs them the most to rid her body of this cancer. She is a courageous woman and I hope this chapter in her life ends very soon. Thanks God for listening. We know you're up there watching over us.
Okay, I'm exhausted now (9:30pm) and MUST go to bed. Tomorrow will be an excellent and productive study day! (Yes, trying to convince myself!)
Love to everyone! xoxo Yo!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Still Checking...
Hi Everyone!
Okay, so I didn't POAS today or take my temps. I'm proud of that. But, I did feel a bit uneasy all day. I wasn't really nauseous at all today, but my bbs do hurt a lot more these last few days. I'm still a bit tired, oh, and AF hasn't shown up...so I guess I'm still PG without knowing from my temps or POAS.
BUT, I still check for AF signs EVERY time I go to the bathroom. I worry when I cough hard that I'm going to upset the delicate growth that is hiding in my uterus. I sometimes feel like I'm having some AF discharge...then check, and nothing. Okay, I'm a little bit crazy.
I remember feeling this way with my first pregnancy, and after a while, the uneasy feeling went away and I stopped being paranoid looking for AF. I hope it goes away with this pregnancy soon too...maybe if the first u/s goes well. So strange for something to be going on in your body that you have NO control over. A prayer and good healthy habits is all I can do.
2 weeks until I take my comprehensive exams. DH has told me I'm NOT allowed to stress out about it, so I'm taking his advice seriously. I am studying, but I know that keeping my stress level down now is really important.
Thanks to everyone for thought and prayers - my little bean is still holding on.
xoxo Yo!
Okay, so I didn't POAS today or take my temps. I'm proud of that. But, I did feel a bit uneasy all day. I wasn't really nauseous at all today, but my bbs do hurt a lot more these last few days. I'm still a bit tired, oh, and AF hasn't shown up...so I guess I'm still PG without knowing from my temps or POAS.
BUT, I still check for AF signs EVERY time I go to the bathroom. I worry when I cough hard that I'm going to upset the delicate growth that is hiding in my uterus. I sometimes feel like I'm having some AF discharge...then check, and nothing. Okay, I'm a little bit crazy.
I remember feeling this way with my first pregnancy, and after a while, the uneasy feeling went away and I stopped being paranoid looking for AF. I hope it goes away with this pregnancy soon too...maybe if the first u/s goes well. So strange for something to be going on in your body that you have NO control over. A prayer and good healthy habits is all I can do.
2 weeks until I take my comprehensive exams. DH has told me I'm NOT allowed to stress out about it, so I'm taking his advice seriously. I am studying, but I know that keeping my stress level down now is really important.
Thanks to everyone for thought and prayers - my little bean is still holding on.
xoxo Yo!
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
I know I'm Pregnant Because...
Hi Everyone!
Okay, so I've had a few people to tell me to STOP my POAS and temperature taking addictions. I'm not sure I'm quite ready to quit cold turkey, but I figured I'd use today's blog to remind myself that there are other ways to convince myself I'm pregnant. Here's goes!
"I know I'm pregnant because..."
1. I almost threw up in the shower today.
2. I feel nauseous and shakey if I get too hungry.
3. DH looks at me with special "super secret" eyes.
4. God is with me and has a plan for me.
5. I've recently ate the BEST green beans EVER (really??? can green beans really be that good???)
6. I don't currently like the taste of chocolate (WHAT??? chocolate is a staple of my life)
7. I feel a "pressure" in my uterus area
8. My breasts are starting to hurt.
9. I've taken 15 urine pregnancy tests and 2 blood tests (oh, wait, I'm not supposed to use this one!)
10. I get up to urniate 2-3 times per night.
11. AF has not shown up yet.
As I mentioned before, I feel a bit like an alcoholic - the AA sayings apply to me right now, so I'm reminding myself to pay attention to the messages. (For those of you who don't know, I have had some people in my family who have been addicted to drugs or alcohol, so I know a lot about the 12 steps.) There are some messages that apply to me right now:
- Let Go and Let God
- One Day at a Time
And, I think it's time for me to say the AA serenity prayer...
God,
Grant me the courage to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can, and
The wisdom to know the difference.
I may not be perfect, but I can try to live by these words as much as possible. They are good messages.
The next hurdle is our u/s, which is on 4/28. Because I didn't ovulate on CD 14 but rather on CD 11, I'm not sure exactly what to expect as far as measurements. If you count from the first day of my LMP, I'll be at 43 days, which is 6w1d. If you count from when I O'd, it will put me at 6w3d or so. It's probably a little early for an u/s, but hopefully we'll see something. We're still so guarded as we've been down this path before and then it ended. (Although we've never made it far enough to have an u/s.) We're hoping and praying that this time our little bean is sticky and snuggly. No matter what though, the love DH and I have for each other is strong and that is worth everything in the world. And, I know I have a lof of people praying for me and it touches my heart. Thank you.
Hope everyone is doing great. Thanks for sharing my journey with me.
xoxo Yo!
Okay, so I've had a few people to tell me to STOP my POAS and temperature taking addictions. I'm not sure I'm quite ready to quit cold turkey, but I figured I'd use today's blog to remind myself that there are other ways to convince myself I'm pregnant. Here's goes!
"I know I'm pregnant because..."
1. I almost threw up in the shower today.
2. I feel nauseous and shakey if I get too hungry.
3. DH looks at me with special "super secret" eyes.
4. God is with me and has a plan for me.
5. I've recently ate the BEST green beans EVER (really??? can green beans really be that good???)
6. I don't currently like the taste of chocolate (WHAT??? chocolate is a staple of my life)
7. I feel a "pressure" in my uterus area
8. My breasts are starting to hurt.
9. I've taken 15 urine pregnancy tests and 2 blood tests (oh, wait, I'm not supposed to use this one!)
10. I get up to urniate 2-3 times per night.
11. AF has not shown up yet.
As I mentioned before, I feel a bit like an alcoholic - the AA sayings apply to me right now, so I'm reminding myself to pay attention to the messages. (For those of you who don't know, I have had some people in my family who have been addicted to drugs or alcohol, so I know a lot about the 12 steps.) There are some messages that apply to me right now:
- Let Go and Let God
- One Day at a Time
And, I think it's time for me to say the AA serenity prayer...
God,
Grant me the courage to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can, and
The wisdom to know the difference.
I may not be perfect, but I can try to live by these words as much as possible. They are good messages.
The next hurdle is our u/s, which is on 4/28. Because I didn't ovulate on CD 14 but rather on CD 11, I'm not sure exactly what to expect as far as measurements. If you count from the first day of my LMP, I'll be at 43 days, which is 6w1d. If you count from when I O'd, it will put me at 6w3d or so. It's probably a little early for an u/s, but hopefully we'll see something. We're still so guarded as we've been down this path before and then it ended. (Although we've never made it far enough to have an u/s.) We're hoping and praying that this time our little bean is sticky and snuggly. No matter what though, the love DH and I have for each other is strong and that is worth everything in the world. And, I know I have a lof of people praying for me and it touches my heart. Thank you.
Hope everyone is doing great. Thanks for sharing my journey with me.
xoxo Yo!
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